Happiness Archive

When You Love Someone, You Stay Loyal To Them

Posted September 20, 2018 By Mark

When you genuinely love someone, you don’t hide your phone from them and text secretly as you are worried about what they might see on the screen.  You don’t use fake names for your contacts nor delete messages so they cannot find anything.  You don’t answer calls late in the night and lie about the person calling you.

When you love someone, you don’t even consider downloading Tinder or similar apps to flip through your options or see how many matches you will get to boost your confidence.  You don’t even think about flirting with others, even if it is completely harmless.

When you love someone, you don’t act like you are single. You don’t give your phone number to people who are obviously interested in you. You don’t act in a way which suggests that you are available.

When you love someone, you don’t lose self-control! You don’t indulge in alcohol and use it as an excuse for cheating or flirting.  You don’t communicate with your exes and look at them as a backup when your relationship comes to an end. You don’t give others a chance, although you are already in a relationship.

When you love someone, you don’t go to your ex whenever you have a tiny argument. You don’t jump in bed with the first person only because you are angry.  You don’t destroy a serious relationship built on faith and trust for a night of distraction.

When you truly love someone, you don’t make them jealous by flirting with others, even if it is harmless and done only to see their reaction.  You don’t call them weird or crazy for getting angry when you stare at others.

When you love someone, you don’t even consider cheating on your partner as an option, whether it is physical or emotional, in big ways or trivial ways.  You don’t risk losing the person you have for something as insignificant as your libido.  You don’t hurt them, no matter what!

When you love someone, you take your love seriously.  You treat them nicely, with kindness and with respect. When you love someone, you stay loyal to them at all costs.  Here is what loyal truly means:

  • Being loyal means never saying anything that would embarrass your partner in public
  • Being loyal means keeping confidences!
  • Being loyal means being fully respectful of your partner`s weakness and helping him/her to overcome them
  • Being loyal means prioritizing your partner`s needs. Keeping them as primary over the needs of any other person
  • Being loyal means constantly reminding your partner that you will be there physically and emotionally, whenever and wherever needed.
  • Being loyal means keeping your word at all costs
  • Being loyal means never speaking bad about you partner to others. You should share your frustrations and remarks with someone close, but without blaming the partner

Sources:

https://thoughtcatalog.com/holly-riordan/2017/11/when-you-love-someone-you-stay-

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When you think about spiritual laws of the universe, your mind may go straight to the Law of Attraction. However, it turns out that there is a whole network of interconnected laws that can impact on every aspect of your life. Even better, although these laws can be used to assist in Law of Attraction work, you don’t need to be working on any particular manifestation goal to benefit here.

Often discussed with reference to the healing practice of Ho’oponopono, the Twelve Spiritual Laws of the Universe each teach you something unique about well-being, happiness, and success. When you have a solid sense of these spiritual laws, you develop a clearer picture of your own place in the world. This guide will explore and summarize all twelve of the laws, helping you to understand how they influence you and showing how your awareness of them can lead to positive change.

The 12 Spiritual Laws Of The Universe

When you don’t understand the connections between the spiritual laws, you naturally encounter obstacles. You may feel lost, frustrated and confused about your purpose. It may even feel like virtually everything goes wrong for you, no matter how well you think you’ve planned.

In contrast, people who live their lives with an awareness of the interconnected laws typically report feeling more confident, productive and reflective than ever before. While there is advanced personal work you can do with respect to each law, even starting out with this general grasp of the different laws may make a noticeable difference to the way you feel.

1. The Law of Divine Oneness

The Law of Divine Oneness is the foundational law, according to which absolutely everything in our universe is interconnected. In other words, every choice, word, desire, and belief you have will also have an impact on the world, and on the people in your life.

Sometimes this impact will be immediate and obvious. At other times, it may take a while to manifest, or you may never even discover that it has occurred. Try to think of yourself as part of everything around you to live in accordance with this law. We are all one, and awareness of this makes us more powerful as well as more empathetic.

2. Law of Vibration

According to the Law of Vibration, every particle in the universe is in constant movement and constantly carries energy. This applies to enormous parts of the universe, like the planets and stars. However, it also applies to the chair underneath you or the table where your computer sits.

In addition, everything has its own specific energy frequency. High energy particles are naturally attuned to other high energy particles, and the same is true for those that have low energy.

If your goal is to live a more productive and full life, consider what you would need to do to heighten your energy frequency.

3. Law of Correspondence

The Law of Correspondence is directly related to the foundational Law of Divine Oneness. The key idea here is that patterns repeat throughout the universe, and that prominent patterns can also be found repeating on a very small scale.

For example, think of the popular example of the spiral pattern that reappears in a huge number of places in the galaxy. Look for patterns in your own life and in your thinking, and notice how they repeat elsewhere in the world. As you do so, consider the kinds of pattern changes you might be able to make, and how those will create change on a large scale.

4. Law of Attraction

As you likely already know, the Law of Attraction tells us that like attracts like. So, in order to have the things you desire in life, you have to work out how to vibrate on the same frequency as these things. The more general lesson here is that being positive, proactive and loving attracts more of the same into your life. Meanwhile, pessimism, fear, and lethargy will lead you to generate more negative experiences in all aspects of life.

By working to live more positively even just today, you’re already using the Law of Attraction to create a better existence for yourself.

5. Law of Inspired Action

Law of Attraction practitioners regularly say that they wish they had known about the Law of Inspired action at an earlier stage! These two laws are tightly bound together, and the Inspired Action law tells us that we must actively pursue our goals.

Many people think that visualizing a goal and developing a positive attitude towards it will be sufficient to exploit the Law of Attraction.

However, you also have to take inspired steps towards that thing that you want. Whether it’s a big or small step, it instantly helps you to attract that relationship, job, or enhanced abundance you seek.

6. Law of Perpetual Transmutation of Energy

The Law of Perpetual Transmutation of Energy states that everything around us is in constant flux. You can’t see all of these changes because many of them exist at the cellular or atomic level, but they carry on regardless.

The reason that it’s so important to be aware of this Law is that it helps you see how you can trigger positive change. Specifically, keep in mind that high vibrations can trigger improvements in low vibrations. For example, if you’re vibrating at a low frequency, exposing yourself to the high frequency of a happy, encouraging friend will naturally trigger energy transmutation in you.

7. The Law of Cause and Effect

One of the most straightforward laws of the universe, the Law of Cause and Effect tells us that all actions have a corresponding reaction. You will already know this, of course, when it comes to the physical aspects of the world. However, perhaps you haven’t considered how this law might be applied to the

spiritual aspects of our universe.

Your spiritual life can impact the world around you, causing positive or negative reactions. Similarly, your physical environment can impact on your spirituality, whether for good or for ill. Ask yourself what types of relationships you see between the spiritual and the physical, and how you might want to change them.

8. The Law of Compensation

According to the Law of Compensation, you will receive what you put out. This is similar to the Law of Attraction, but with a focus on the idea that compensation can come in many forms.

For example, if you win a large amount of money then you might think you’re getting a reward. However, depending on how you have lived, your vast amount of wealth could lead to a worse life rather than a better one.

Essentially, you reap what you sow. This law reminds you to be careful about how you treat others, and indeed the planet.

9. Law of Relativity

The Law of Relativity is all about the neutrality of things when seen in isolation. So, no particular person, experience, emotion or action is evaluated as good or bad until you look at it in comparison with something else.

For example, you may think you are poor, but perhaps that’s because you have three wealthy uncles. By keeping this law in mind, you remain conscious of the fact that there are always multiple perspectives on anything that happens to you. Trying to slip into these alternate perspectives can make you more grateful, and can also show you where you can make improvements in life.

10. Law of Polarity

When thinking about the Law of Polarity, the most important thing to remember is that absolutely everything has an opposite and that it’s the very existence of these opposites that allow us to understand our life. Consequently, when you go through something difficult, it will be this thing that helps you truly appreciate the good developments to come.

By regularly reminding yourself of this, you can improve your resilience in troubled times. For example, though a bad breakup is painful, it teaches you what doesn’t work for you in a relationship, helping you to eventually find what does.

11. Law of Rhythm

Sometimes called the Law of Perpetual Motion, the Law of Rhythm is (unsurprisingly) focused on movement. In particular, it refers to the fact that all things come in cycles.

You can see this in nature, e.g., in the seasons, and in the body’s aging process. However, it equally applies to a person’s life stages, and reflecting on this helps you to gain perspective. Today’s season may be good, but nothing is permanent, so enjoy what you have while it lasts. Alternatively, perhaps you’re in a negative part of the cycle right now, but it may be the very thing that prepares you for a prosperous change in cycles next month.

12. Law of Gender

Finally, the Law of Gender has very little to do with biological sex. Rather, it refers to the fact that there are two major types of energy. You can think of them as masculine and feminine, as yin and yang, or as anima and animus. We all contain a certain amount of both energy and must find a way to achieve a balance between both types if we are to live authentically and happily. Think about the role each type of energy appears to play in your life, and whether there is an excess or a deficit of either.

Credit goes to http://www.thelawofattraction.com/12-spiritual-laws-universe/

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A successful business man was growing old and knew it was time to choose a successor to take over the business.

Instead of choosing one of his Directors or his children, he decided to do something different. He called all the young executives in his company together.

He said, “It is time for me to step down and choose the next CEO. I have decided to choose one of you..”

The young executives were Shocked, but the boss continued. “I am going to give each one of you a SEED today – one very special SEED… I want you to plant the seed, water it, and come back here one year from today with what you have grown from the seed I have given you. I will then judge the plants that you bring, and the one I choose will be the next CEO.”

One man, named Jim, was there that day and he, like the others, received a seed. He went home and excitedly, told his wife the story. She helped him get a pot, soil and compost and he planted the seed. Everyday, he would water it and watch to see if it had grown. After about three weeks, some of the other executives began to talk about their seeds and the plants that were beginning to grow.

Jim kept checking his seed, but nothing ever grew.

Three weeks, four weeks, five weeks went by, still nothing.

By now, others were talking about their plants, but Jim didn’t have a plant and he felt like a failure.

Six months went by — still nothing in Jim’s pot. He just knew he had killed his seed. Everyone else had trees and tall plants, but he had nothing. Jim didn’t say anything to his colleagues, however.

He just kept watering and fertilizing the soil – He so wanted the seed to grow.

A year finally went by and all the young executives of the company brought their plants to the CEO for inspection.

Jim told his wife that he wasn’t going to take an empty pot. But she asked him to be honest about what happened. Jim felt sick to his stomach, it was going to be the most embarrassing moment of his life, but he knew his wife was right. He took his empty pot to the board room. When Jim arrived, he was amazed at the variety of plants grown by the other executives. They were beautiful — in all shapes and sizes. Jim put his empty pot on the floor and many of his colleagues laughed, a few felt sorry for him!

When the CEO arrived, he surveyed the room and greeted his young executives.

Jim just tried to hide in the back. “My, what great plants, trees, and flowers you have grown,” said the CEO. “Today one of you will be appointed the next CEO!”

All of a sudden, the CEO spotted Jim at the back of the room with his empty pot. He ordered the Financial Director to bring him to the front. Jim was terrified. He thought, “The CEO knows I’m a failure! Maybe he will have me fired!”

When Jim got to the front, the CEO asked him what had happened to his seed – Jim told him the story.

The CEO asked everyone to sit down except Jim. He looked at Jim, and then announced to the young executives, “Behold your next Chief Executive Officer!

His name is Jim!” Jim couldn’t believe it. Jim couldn’t even grow his seed.

“How could he be the new CEO?” the others said.

Then the CEO said, “One year ago today, I gave everyone in this room a seed. I told you to take the seed, plant it, water it, and bring it back to me today. But I gave you all boiled seeds; they were dead – it was not possible for them to grow.

All of you, except Jim, have brought me trees and plants and flowers. When you found that the seed would not grow, you substituted another seed for the one I gave you. Jim was the only one with the courage and honesty to bring me a pot with my seed in it. Therefore, he is the one who will be the new Chief Executive Officer!”

* If you plant honesty, you will reap trust

* If you plant goodness, you will reap friends

* If you plant humility, you will reap greatness

* If you plant perseverance, you will reap contentment

* If you plant consideration, you will reap perspective

* If you plant hard work, you will reap success

* If you plant forgiveness, you will reap reconciliation

* If you plant faith in God, you will reap a harvest

So, be careful what you plant now; it will determine what you will reap later.

“Whatever You Give To Life, Life Gives You Back”

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When creating a family, everyone wants to be happy in their marriage. And one of the criteria for happiness is marital fidelity. Willard F. Harley, Jr., Ph.D., a clinical psychologist and marriage counselor conducted an experiment with more than 800 couples and found out that men and women have basic needs that should be satisfied in order to decrease the chances of infidelity.

We read Willard F. Harley Jr.’s book His Needs, Her Needs: Building an Affair-Proof Marriage and we want to share the information about which needs, according to Hartley, should be satisfied to ensure that the couple is happy and the partners don’t want to change anything.

1. Her need to have tenderness and his need to have sex

  • Women have the need to have tenderness.

It’s not just about tenderness, but also about attachment and love. These feelings can be expressed in multiple ways: kissing and hugging, flowers, calls, and general caring gestures. All these things make a woman feel protected and comfortable.

  • Men have the need to have sex.

Women often underestimate men’s strong need to have sex. Willard F. Harley thinks that men’s need for sex and women’s need for tenderness are connected. If a man doesn’t show any love or tenderness, there are chances that he won’t get any sex. And vice versa, if a woman doesn’t let a man have sex with her, he won’t be tender with her.

2. Her need to talk and his need to have a friend for hobbies and entertainment

  • Women have the need to talk.

Women need their men to listen to them and give them feedback about what they say. In courtship, the couple happily meets each other and talks. For women, it’s very important to have the same thing in their marriage. Willard F. Harley found out that in order to feel satisfied, women need about 15 hours of men’s attention per week. This is a little more than 2 hours per day.

  • Men need their women to be a companion in entertainment.

Women often share their partners’ interests while dating: they go fishing, watch hockey, and so on. In marriage, they either try to get their partners enjoy what they like or let their husband do what they like alone. But for men, it’s very important that their wives are good companions. According to the psychologist, relaxing with their wives is the second most important thing for men.

3. Her need for honesty and his need to have an attractive wife

  • Women need an honest and open partner.

Women’s trust is based on the honesty of their partner. That’s why, in order not to lose their trust, it’s very important for a man to be honest even with the smallest details.

  • Men need physically attractive wives.

Let’s be realistic: men can’t appreciate their wives only for their intelligence. They also need them to be physically attractive.

4. Her need to have enough money and his need to have a cozy house

  • Women need to have enough money.

We might say that there is never enough money but there is a certain amount necessary for life, stability, and feeling safe. This is what the scientist means.

  • Men need their houses to be cozy.

Men encounter a lot of problems and tasks every day that need to be solved regularly, so it’s very important that they have a tidy and orderly place where they can rest. This need is so strong that they even dream about it.

5. Her need to have a husband who is a good father and his need to be admired

  • Women need their husbands to be good fathers.

It’s important to women that their husbands are good role models for their sons and the image of a perfect man for their daughters. Also, men need to take certain responsibilities in the development and education of their children.

  • Men need to be admired.

It’s important for men to be proud of themselves and realize that their women admire them. Sincere admiration is a serious motivator for men. It inspires them to do even more.

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14 Signs You’ve Found A Truly Good Man

Posted June 2, 2018 By Mark

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A good man is hard to find. Despite the fact that the odds will not always be in your favor, the ideas of romantic relationships, true love and soulmates are still alive.

It’s estimated that the two-thirds of Americans believe in the concept of a ‘soulmate,’ that there’s one man or woman out there in the world whom they’re destined to find and love.

With more than 7.6 billion people on the planet, it’s no wonder that we’re going to have to kiss several frogs before we finally find our prince charming. The dating world brings both great joy and unbearable heartache. Despite the possibility of getting hurt, it’s all worth it when you’ve finally found ‘the one.’ However, how can you know for sure that the person you are with is worthy of it?

#1 – He Makes You Feel Secure

One of the traits of a relationship which is highly coveted is that of security. A good man will certainly go out of his way to make sure that you have nothing less than that. Determined to keep you secure in any situation, he is not afraid to stand up for the woman he loves.

#2 – He’s Never Abusive

That doesn’t simply refer to the fact that he does not physically lay a hand on you. A good man is not abusive in any way. A good man won’t be physically, mentally or emotionally abusive to anybody that he meets in his life: from the waiter at his favorite restaurant right up to his woman and his family.

#3 – He’s There to Support You

That’s not to say that he is there to agree with every single thing you say or do blindly. However, when it truly matters, you can count on him; he’s going to be there to support you throughout your life’s challenges.

#4 – You Are His Priority

If he were to list his priorities, you would be among the firsts. He understands that to have a happy, healthy relationship you cannot leave work, hobbies, friends, and family behind. However, he will devote a great amount of his time to the woman who matters to him.

#5 – He is Honest

Dishonesty is among the greatest relationship killers. A good man always tells the truth, even if it’s uncomfortable or hurtful. He understands the importance of honesty and won’t give you any reason not to trust him.

#6 – He Will Never Cross the Line

You’re going to have some arguments and disagreements throughout your relationship because that’s an inevitable part of any relationship. However, he understands that he can disagree with your opinions without crossing any lines into attacking, degrading or disrespecting you.

#7 – He Makes You Feel Beautiful Inside and Out

A good man does not merely say the words; he wants to make sure that you always feel beautiful both inside and out. He does that through his actions and how he interacts with you every day.

#8 – He Stands by You Through Everything

Throughout all of your life’s challenges, struggles and celebrations your good man will always stand proudly by your side. He can understand that real love stays strong in both the good and the bad times, and he would not even entertain the idea of ever abandoning you when you need him the most.

#9 – He Appreciates the ‘Little Things’ in Life

While several men will focus on the grand gestures and forget about the smaller nuances of a content relationship, a good man always appreciates the little moments. He’s the guy who will live you little love notes, hold the door, and do the dishes without being asked.

#10 – He Understands That Actions Speak Louder Than Words

Anyone can talk a big game, making themselves sound like the perfect romantic ones. The difference is that a good man follows up with actions to support his statements. He knows that his actions speak louder than any words and he’s willing to put effort into living with this knowledge in mind each day.

#11 – He Inspires You

When you’re around him, you find yourself trying to be the best version of yourself. Energetic, motivated and true to himself, a good man sets an example you cannot help but follow.

#12 – He Has Worked Hard to Earn Your Trust

A good man knows that trust is not something that’s freely handed out to just anybody and everybody. He dedicates himself every day to earn your trust, and will never take it for granted.

#13 – He Opens Up to You

A relationship is a partnership, and as such you expect your partner to be there with you no matter what might happen in life. A good man understands that to be a cohesive team, you both need to open up to each other and share even your most vulnerable sides.

#14 – He Actively Tries to Be the Best Version of Himself

He isn’t willing to settle for simply being a ‘good’ person in this world. A good man knows that he has the potential to become great, and actively seeks opportunities for self-improvement and growth while trying to become the best version of himself.

 

**

This article 14 Signs You’ve Found A Truly Good Man was published by Thinking Humanity and it is re-posted here under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License

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** While this article is informative for the women – it is in a very real way the same for the men.  They also need to know you want them as well. **

Regardless of what a woman may believe is the reason why a guy does not pursue her strong enough, the true reason is the fact that he isn’t into her enough. Remember that you don’t intimidate him and that he isn’t shy.

In case he’s interested, he’ll pursue you. However, in case he isn’t interested, you may live next door and he won’t pay attention to you.

A guy has a strong desire to be the initiator in a relationship. It is actually part of his manhood. He likes to seize the challenge.

He likes the pursuit. When he knows what he truly wants, he’ll go after it. So, in case a guy you love isn’t pursuing you, it means that he isn’t interested in you.

He may make many excuses as to why he does not go after you. He may tell you anything or even beat around the bush or lie to you to keep you from feeling hurt. He may tell you that he is busy, he has other things going on, he is swamped with work, or he might even ghost you.

He’s a charming and good looking man. His smile does make you melt. He may open doors for you, and he may have even taken you on several dates. However, what about the days or even weeks that you have been left asking yourself if you did something wrong or caused him to lose interest in you?

Do not chase after a guy that does not give you the time of day, or that does not put in the effort to talk to you. You should stop talking to him, when you start doubting that you’re anything special.

Do not allow him to play with your feelings, mind, and body. You must know your self-worth. You must be secure and confident enough with yourself. You shouldn’t waste your time by waiting around for a guy that doesn’t want to go after or pursue you.

A real man will pursue you on a daily basis. He’ll not play with your emotions, and he’ll not call you only when it is convenient for him. He’ll lead you closer to your goals as he does want you to be happy and succeed. He’ll admire you for all your imperfections and flaws. He’ll not tell you that he does accept your flaws and then use them against you when he is frustrated or angry with you. He’ll not treat you with disrespect. He’ll motivate you to be the best version of yourself.

Life is, without a doubt, busy. However, in case he genuinely cares about you, he’ll make time for you.

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Happy Couples

Posted April 26, 2018 By Mark

 

 

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In any lasting relationship togetherness is critical. Don’t ever underestimate the power of being together. Together we can do anything. Together we will do everything. Together we will always win and we will become “One”. Nothing can separate the togetherness of being “One”.


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6 Signs You’re Meant To Be Together

Posted February 25, 2017 By Mark

 

I really think that we can all agree on one thing – being crazy in love is one of the most magical experiences in our lives? What do you think? Do you share the same enthusiasm? Share your thoughts in the comment section below.

 

And, the following questions usually “appear” when you meet someone new:

  • To stay or not to stay?
  • Is he/she the RIGHT one?
  • Are we compatible?

People, let’s face it – you (CAN’T) don’t always know if you are meant for each other. Yes, nobody knows! Sometimes is just as simple as stepping back and opening up your heart to what’s in front of you. But, sometimes it can be very (difficult, challenging … )

But, you shouldn’t be worried, because in this article we’re going to show you 6 signs you’re destined to be together. This means that you should be very careful and don’t ignore these signs! Ladies and gentlemen – sit back, relax and enjoy the ride:

1 – Respect.

We all know that respect is very important for every relationship. Mutual appreciation requires a mature level of trust and respect (and respect requires honesty). In my personal opinion, the best and “purest” form of love is how you behave with another in a relationship, and in that state of respect you get to share things that you wouldn’t tell anyone. And, this is very important for you to remember – respect is earned. You can’t buy it,  you can’t steal it – you have to EARN IT!  And, one last thing – if you are in a relationship that provides safety and security, then you’re really lucky (because you’ve found your perfect match).

2 – You have the same interests. 

You and your partner share the same passion for sports, hobbies, or culinary delights. Yes, this a great sign for the longevity of your relationship.

3  – You share your deepest secrets. 

You share your deepest secrets or your greatest fears with your partner. Yes, if you’re able to trust a partner and feel comfortable enough to share your secrets with him/her, then you should know that this will strengthen your connection.

4 – Jealousy – NO.

You always enjoy the time together, but you also need a private space. There is no jealousy in the relationship because you still remain individuals. There is no strain for past insecurities because you feel at ease with, and without, each other all the time. You spend time with friends and apart. Each time you reconnect it is rewarding. There is no co-dependency or possessiveness. You crave to be with each other but it is important to have freedom of expression and separate interests.

5 – You “fight” well. 

Unfortunately, no couple is immune to arguing. Yes, we all know that – it’s inevitable. But, did you know that how well you do it is the true test of your relationship? And remember – if you’re able to eventually reach a productive conclusion the next time the two of you spar over watching your/your partner’s favorite TV show, you’re practically meant to be.

6 – You finish each other’s sentences. 

YES, this may sound cliché, but when two people know each other well enough to know what the other is thinking, it means both of you can be yourselves, completely. And there’s nothing better than being with someone who loves you exactly the way you are. 

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20 Ways to Always Be Happy

Posted December 23, 2016 By Mark

 

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  1. Socialize. Having lots of contacts with others is the key to success. One person might give you a really useful idea for work, whilst in other cases you might meet someone really special. It doesn’t matter if you don’t become best friends with everyone that you meet; the main thing is simply to keep in contact. Having a wide circle of acquaintances is a guarantee that you’ll have someone to turn to whatever problem your facing or question you have. Of course, this means you have to be ready to help others as much as they’ll be ready to help you. But that should make you feel great as well.
  2. Don’t be too modest. If you don’t show initiative and a degree of courage, you could end up being the equivalent of an unused piece of furniture sitting in a dusty corner somewhere for your whole life — despite having a huge number of talents. Promoting yourself and your abilities is a skill which you simply have to acquire if you want to get anywhere in life. There’s nothing shameful in focusing people’s attention on your abilities and successes. People need to understand that you’re successful, so that they know you have the potential to be useful to them as well. The trick is to not let self-promotion turn into arrogance.
  3. Do what you enjoy. It sounds too simple, but it’s true: you’ll become happier much more easily if you just do what you genuinely like doing, and do it often. Don’t try to do what others demand or expect you to do; there are too many people out there (none of whom are genuinely happy) who waste their whole lives doing what they think society expects them to do. Listen to your own inner thoughts, feelings and hopes, and ignore social pressures. Become yourself, and you’ll find joy.
  4. Be friends with positive people. The most inspiring kinds of people are the optimists — those whose lives aren’t necessarily perfect, but who nevertheless have the innate ability to look at the challenges life throws at them with humor, and therefore don’t over-dramatize any situation. People’s attitudes are affected by others as if by chain reaction. Someone’s bad mood can very easily rub off on you over some trivial matter — that means you should try to stick around with positive people as much as possible. It’s a fact that positive people generally have greater success in both work and relationships. Small, daily moments of joy add up to happiness overall.
  5. Treat life as a game, which you sometimes win and sometimes lose. Some people ruin their lives by taking it too seriously — it just leads to tension, stress and ultimately failure. Happy people are often the ones who don’t look at things so fatalistically and understand that life is a lottery. Any problem can be seen in a light-hearted way. It’s not always easy to see the funny side of things, but if you can, it helps 100 per cent, deflating the problem like a balloon.
  6. Think positively. Negative thinking is crippling — it shapes your behavior, which then affects your thinking, and it becomes a vicious circle. And the saddest thing is people don’t even realize they’re stuck in this negative cycle. The only answer is to think positive, to stop wasting time mulling over your real or imagined failures. There is always something positive you can focus on — as they say, hope springs eternal. That’s the only way out.
  7. Give yourself credit. Be happy at your successes, no matter how small they might be. We say to ourselves far too much something along the lines of: ’You call that success? That was nothing. Other people have achieved far more than I have.’ Never, ever devalue what you have achieved, otherwise you won’t experience any more achievements. Give yourself credit, and reward yourself in whatever way you like. Psychologists suggest that, should you reward yourself with a present, put it somewhere where you’ll see it every day — this will motivate you to go further.
  8. Smile. It’s said that even a forced smile can lead to the same feelings as a sincere one, given time. Working those muscles in your face opens up your blood vessels and increases the supply of oxygen to your brain, your body’s cells and your central nervous system. This leads to the production of more endorphins, which make you more optimistic. And of course, talking to a smiling person is always more pleasant than talking to a sad one.
  9. Don’t get stuck in a rut. Some people find it hard to forget even the tiniest, most insignificant unpleasant experience. This is an innate side to their character which they have to struggle against. It’s important to know how to consciously shift your mood and emotion from negative to positive, and to change your behaviour depending on the circumstances. Don’t get stuck in an orbit around your failures. Look for an alternative perspective on life, and your chances of being happy will increase.
  10. Laugh more, laugh often. When we laugh, we feel great. This is partly the result of the fact that laughter stimulates the production of certain chemicals, including endorphins, which naturally raise our spirits. When you laugh, you feel better, and when you feel better, there’s a greater chance you will come up with new ideas about how to improve things. The simplest, guaranteed way to do this — just watch a comedy program which you like.
  11. Focus on the positive things around you. If you spend large amounts of your time listening to gloomy music or reading about all the bad things going on in the world through the newspapers, don’t count on having a good mood very often. Instead, focus on the positive things around you: all the beautiful things you have, wonderful music, great people you know and love. Only let these good things influence your thoughts, and you’ll be happier and more joyful straight away.
  12. Eat properly. Don’t get distracted by all those severe diets. Not eating enough leads to fatigue, sluggish concentration, and to apathy. You won’t ever feel better that way. But apart from that, food is also one of the greatest sources of pleasure you can find. Good food can release endorphins as good as anything else. So, don’t starve yourself — eat a lot, and eat well.
  13. Find an outlet for your creativity. The therapeutic effects of having a hobby have been proved time and again. Whatever it is you like doing — painting, reading, music, dance, sport, craft work — you can enjoy doing it yourself. Engaging in your hobbies reduces stress, helps you to relax, and has a positive effect on your overall health. It’s the ideal method for raising your sense of self-worth and overcoming that sense of self-pity. Creative people are often the happiest — this is due to the amount of endorphins their generating from all that focusing on their hobbies.
  14. Try something new. Don’t get locked into doing the same old things. Life never stands still, and trying something new might lead to very important, positive changes in your life. If an opportunity appears, why not go for it? Get back into education, change your profession completely. Success most often comes to those who are willing to take a risk. Always say yes to new offers and suggestions, even if you don’t know what exactly it is you’re going to do.
  15. Lighten your load. Apologize to those you have wronged, pay off your debts, throw out all those things you never use anymore, fulfill all your outstanding tasks and responsibilities. In short, clean up your life and put things in order in the same way you would with your computer. You’ll feel happier and ready for a new start.
  16. Get more sunshine. How much sunshine you get can affect your mood. People with depression have been known to even get ’light therapy’ because it can affect things so much. Darkness produces more melatonin in your body, which lowers your mood and gives you gloomy thoughts. An extra portion of sunlight can turn this around. So, if the sun is shining, head outside!
  17. Regularly do something cultural. The arts can have tremendous healing effect on the soul. They drive out your everyday worries and transform your mood. This is because the impressions that creative works have on you increase your brain’s activity, which can act as an impetus for new ideas and the inspiration to realize your plans and dreams. So, head to the theater or the art gallery — today.
  18. Stay in touch with nature. Even a short getaway from the city can restore your positive energy. Walk barefoot on the grass, brush your hands over the bark of an old tree, breathe in the scents of the forest, listen to the sounds of the river and the song of the birds, and you’re guaranteed to feel much better. Even a walk in a local park can reduce the level of any negative feelings or thoughts you have and free up internal intellectual, creative and emotional reserves — which you can then channel in the right direction.
  19. Keep a good luck charm. This could be something as simple as a little plush toy, or a ring. Whatever you had in your possession at happy moments in your life and which you can easily carry with you anywhere at all times. Here the placebo effect can come into play — if you genuinely believe a lucky charm brings you luck, then you’ll be subconsciously motivated to get what you want.
  20. Accept that you’re lucky. Think about all the things which prove that you’re actually an immensely lucky person. Think about all the you have, and be thankful for it. In actual fact, it just seems like you have no reason to ever be happy or grateful — that’s not really the case. You have a roof over your head; you aren’t going hungry; you’re free to choose your own path in life. And if nothing else, you have been blessed with the gift of life. Think objectively about all the things you should be grateful for, and be grateful! Just understanding how lucky you are is already half the battle on the path to success and happiness. Now you just have to make a bit more effort to reach your destination.

 

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Glass of Water

Posted December 19, 2016 By Mark

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How heavy is this glass of water? The answer will surprise you.

A psychologist walked around a room while teaching stress management to an audience. As she raised a glass of water, everyone expected they’d be asked the “half empty or half full” question. Instead, with a smile on her face, she inquired: “How heavy is this glass of water?”

Answers called out ranged from 8 oz. to 20 oz.

She replied, “The absolute weight doesn’t matter. It depends on how long I hold it. If I hold it for a minute, it’s not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I’ll have an ache in my arm. If I hold it for a day, my arm will feel numb and paralyzed. In each case, the weight of the glass doesn’t change, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.”

She continued, “The stresses and worries in life are like that glass of water. Think about them for a while and nothing happens. Think about them a bit longer and they begin to hurt. And if you think about them all day long, you will feel paralyzed – incapable of doing anything.”

Remember to put the glass down.

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