Happiness Archive

6 Signs You’re Meant To Be Together

Posted February 25, 2017 By Mark

 

I really think that we can all agree on one thing – being crazy in love is one of the most magical experiences in our lives? What do you think? Do you share the same enthusiasm? Share your thoughts in the comment section below.

 

And, the following questions usually “appear” when you meet someone new:

  • To stay or not to stay?
  • Is he/she the RIGHT one?
  • Are we compatible?

People, let’s face it – you (CAN’T) don’t always know if you are meant for each other. Yes, nobody knows! Sometimes is just as simple as stepping back and opening up your heart to what’s in front of you. But, sometimes it can be very (difficult, challenging … )

But, you shouldn’t be worried, because in this article we’re going to show you 6 signs you’re destined to be together. This means that you should be very careful and don’t ignore these signs! Ladies and gentlemen – sit back, relax and enjoy the ride:

1 – Respect.

We all know that respect is very important for every relationship. Mutual appreciation requires a mature level of trust and respect (and respect requires honesty). In my personal opinion, the best and “purest” form of love is how you behave with another in a relationship, and in that state of respect you get to share things that you wouldn’t tell anyone. And, this is very important for you to remember – respect is earned. You can’t buy it,  you can’t steal it – you have to EARN IT!  And, one last thing – if you are in a relationship that provides safety and security, then you’re really lucky (because you’ve found your perfect match).

2 – You have the same interests. 

You and your partner share the same passion for sports, hobbies, or culinary delights. Yes, this a great sign for the longevity of your relationship.

3  – You share your deepest secrets. 

You share your deepest secrets or your greatest fears with your partner. Yes, if you’re able to trust a partner and feel comfortable enough to share your secrets with him/her, then you should know that this will strengthen your connection.

4 – Jealousy – NO.

You always enjoy the time together, but you also need a private space. There is no jealousy in the relationship because you still remain individuals. There is no strain for past insecurities because you feel at ease with, and without, each other all the time. You spend time with friends and apart. Each time you reconnect it is rewarding. There is no co-dependency or possessiveness. You crave to be with each other but it is important to have freedom of expression and separate interests.

5 – You “fight” well. 

Unfortunately, no couple is immune to arguing. Yes, we all know that – it’s inevitable. But, did you know that how well you do it is the true test of your relationship? And remember – if you’re able to eventually reach a productive conclusion the next time the two of you spar over watching your/your partner’s favorite TV show, you’re practically meant to be.

6 – You finish each other’s sentences. 

YES, this may sound cliché, but when two people know each other well enough to know what the other is thinking, it means both of you can be yourselves, completely. And there’s nothing better than being with someone who loves you exactly the way you are. 

20 Ways to Always Be Happy

Posted December 23, 2016 By Mark

 

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  1. Socialize. Having lots of contacts with others is the key to success. One person might give you a really useful idea for work, whilst in other cases you might meet someone really special. It doesn’t matter if you don’t become best friends with everyone that you meet; the main thing is simply to keep in contact. Having a wide circle of acquaintances is a guarantee that you’ll have someone to turn to whatever problem your facing or question you have. Of course, this means you have to be ready to help others as much as they’ll be ready to help you. But that should make you feel great as well.
  2. Don’t be too modest. If you don’t show initiative and a degree of courage, you could end up being the equivalent of an unused piece of furniture sitting in a dusty corner somewhere for your whole life — despite having a huge number of talents. Promoting yourself and your abilities is a skill which you simply have to acquire if you want to get anywhere in life. There’s nothing shameful in focusing people’s attention on your abilities and successes. People need to understand that you’re successful, so that they know you have the potential to be useful to them as well. The trick is to not let self-promotion turn into arrogance.
  3. Do what you enjoy. It sounds too simple, but it’s true: you’ll become happier much more easily if you just do what you genuinely like doing, and do it often. Don’t try to do what others demand or expect you to do; there are too many people out there (none of whom are genuinely happy) who waste their whole lives doing what they think society expects them to do. Listen to your own inner thoughts, feelings and hopes, and ignore social pressures. Become yourself, and you’ll find joy.
  4. Be friends with positive people. The most inspiring kinds of people are the optimists — those whose lives aren’t necessarily perfect, but who nevertheless have the innate ability to look at the challenges life throws at them with humor, and therefore don’t over-dramatize any situation. People’s attitudes are affected by others as if by chain reaction. Someone’s bad mood can very easily rub off on you over some trivial matter — that means you should try to stick around with positive people as much as possible. It’s a fact that positive people generally have greater success in both work and relationships. Small, daily moments of joy add up to happiness overall.
  5. Treat life as a game, which you sometimes win and sometimes lose. Some people ruin their lives by taking it too seriously — it just leads to tension, stress and ultimately failure. Happy people are often the ones who don’t look at things so fatalistically and understand that life is a lottery. Any problem can be seen in a light-hearted way. It’s not always easy to see the funny side of things, but if you can, it helps 100 per cent, deflating the problem like a balloon.
  6. Think positively. Negative thinking is crippling — it shapes your behavior, which then affects your thinking, and it becomes a vicious circle. And the saddest thing is people don’t even realize they’re stuck in this negative cycle. The only answer is to think positive, to stop wasting time mulling over your real or imagined failures. There is always something positive you can focus on — as they say, hope springs eternal. That’s the only way out.
  7. Give yourself credit. Be happy at your successes, no matter how small they might be. We say to ourselves far too much something along the lines of: ’You call that success? That was nothing. Other people have achieved far more than I have.’ Never, ever devalue what you have achieved, otherwise you won’t experience any more achievements. Give yourself credit, and reward yourself in whatever way you like. Psychologists suggest that, should you reward yourself with a present, put it somewhere where you’ll see it every day — this will motivate you to go further.
  8. Smile. It’s said that even a forced smile can lead to the same feelings as a sincere one, given time. Working those muscles in your face opens up your blood vessels and increases the supply of oxygen to your brain, your body’s cells and your central nervous system. This leads to the production of more endorphins, which make you more optimistic. And of course, talking to a smiling person is always more pleasant than talking to a sad one.
  9. Don’t get stuck in a rut. Some people find it hard to forget even the tiniest, most insignificant unpleasant experience. This is an innate side to their character which they have to struggle against. It’s important to know how to consciously shift your mood and emotion from negative to positive, and to change your behaviour depending on the circumstances. Don’t get stuck in an orbit around your failures. Look for an alternative perspective on life, and your chances of being happy will increase.
  10. Laugh more, laugh often. When we laugh, we feel great. This is partly the result of the fact that laughter stimulates the production of certain chemicals, including endorphins, which naturally raise our spirits. When you laugh, you feel better, and when you feel better, there’s a greater chance you will come up with new ideas about how to improve things. The simplest, guaranteed way to do this — just watch a comedy program which you like.
  11. Focus on the positive things around you. If you spend large amounts of your time listening to gloomy music or reading about all the bad things going on in the world through the newspapers, don’t count on having a good mood very often. Instead, focus on the positive things around you: all the beautiful things you have, wonderful music, great people you know and love. Only let these good things influence your thoughts, and you’ll be happier and more joyful straight away.
  12. Eat properly. Don’t get distracted by all those severe diets. Not eating enough leads to fatigue, sluggish concentration, and to apathy. You won’t ever feel better that way. But apart from that, food is also one of the greatest sources of pleasure you can find. Good food can release endorphins as good as anything else. So, don’t starve yourself — eat a lot, and eat well.
  13. Find an outlet for your creativity. The therapeutic effects of having a hobby have been proved time and again. Whatever it is you like doing — painting, reading, music, dance, sport, craft work — you can enjoy doing it yourself. Engaging in your hobbies reduces stress, helps you to relax, and has a positive effect on your overall health. It’s the ideal method for raising your sense of self-worth and overcoming that sense of self-pity. Creative people are often the happiest — this is due to the amount of endorphins their generating from all that focusing on their hobbies.
  14. Try something new. Don’t get locked into doing the same old things. Life never stands still, and trying something new might lead to very important, positive changes in your life. If an opportunity appears, why not go for it? Get back into education, change your profession completely. Success most often comes to those who are willing to take a risk. Always say yes to new offers and suggestions, even if you don’t know what exactly it is you’re going to do.
  15. Lighten your load. Apologize to those you have wronged, pay off your debts, throw out all those things you never use anymore, fulfill all your outstanding tasks and responsibilities. In short, clean up your life and put things in order in the same way you would with your computer. You’ll feel happier and ready for a new start.
  16. Get more sunshine. How much sunshine you get can affect your mood. People with depression have been known to even get ’light therapy’ because it can affect things so much. Darkness produces more melatonin in your body, which lowers your mood and gives you gloomy thoughts. An extra portion of sunlight can turn this around. So, if the sun is shining, head outside!
  17. Regularly do something cultural. The arts can have tremendous healing effect on the soul. They drive out your everyday worries and transform your mood. This is because the impressions that creative works have on you increase your brain’s activity, which can act as an impetus for new ideas and the inspiration to realize your plans and dreams. So, head to the theater or the art gallery — today.
  18. Stay in touch with nature. Even a short getaway from the city can restore your positive energy. Walk barefoot on the grass, brush your hands over the bark of an old tree, breathe in the scents of the forest, listen to the sounds of the river and the song of the birds, and you’re guaranteed to feel much better. Even a walk in a local park can reduce the level of any negative feelings or thoughts you have and free up internal intellectual, creative and emotional reserves — which you can then channel in the right direction.
  19. Keep a good luck charm. This could be something as simple as a little plush toy, or a ring. Whatever you had in your possession at happy moments in your life and which you can easily carry with you anywhere at all times. Here the placebo effect can come into play — if you genuinely believe a lucky charm brings you luck, then you’ll be subconsciously motivated to get what you want.
  20. Accept that you’re lucky. Think about all the things which prove that you’re actually an immensely lucky person. Think about all the you have, and be thankful for it. In actual fact, it just seems like you have no reason to ever be happy or grateful — that’s not really the case. You have a roof over your head; you aren’t going hungry; you’re free to choose your own path in life. And if nothing else, you have been blessed with the gift of life. Think objectively about all the things you should be grateful for, and be grateful! Just understanding how lucky you are is already half the battle on the path to success and happiness. Now you just have to make a bit more effort to reach your destination.

 

Glass of Water

Posted December 19, 2016 By Mark

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How heavy is this glass of water? The answer will surprise you.

A psychologist walked around a room while teaching stress management to an audience. As she raised a glass of water, everyone expected they’d be asked the “half empty or half full” question. Instead, with a smile on her face, she inquired: “How heavy is this glass of water?”

Answers called out ranged from 8 oz. to 20 oz.

She replied, “The absolute weight doesn’t matter. It depends on how long I hold it. If I hold it for a minute, it’s not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I’ll have an ache in my arm. If I hold it for a day, my arm will feel numb and paralyzed. In each case, the weight of the glass doesn’t change, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.”

She continued, “The stresses and worries in life are like that glass of water. Think about them for a while and nothing happens. Think about them a bit longer and they begin to hurt. And if you think about them all day long, you will feel paralyzed – incapable of doing anything.”

Remember to put the glass down.

The Secret to Happiness

Posted December 7, 2016 By Mark

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The secret is to release attachment To outcomes. A fear that many people have is that if they don’t hold tightly to their goals and dreams and think about them all day long, they won’t accomplish them. Yet it is the very attachment to outcomes, to getting a specific result, that sets the stage for anxiety, the fear that you won’t achieve what you want.

As you learn to release the attachment, new creative energies—as well as feelings of courage and confidence—spring forth, and actually move you closer to your objectives.

Worrying about the future is one of the main causes of stress in our lives. It is a habit that just perpetuates fear, the uncomfortable feeling that we aren’t enough as we are. It keeps us stuck in the belief that such-and-such must happen if we are going to be happy, and that if it doesn’t, our lives will be miserable.There’s a story about J. Krishnamurti that speaks reams about what it means to be free of this limiting, fear-based pattern of thinking. Every spring he used to give talks in a beautiful oak grove in Ojai, in southern California. He had been speaking there for over sixty years. On this particular occasion when I went to hear him, in the late nineteen-seventies, there must have been close to two thousand people in attendance, sitting on the grass, or in their folding chairs.

Revealing His Secret

Part way through this particular talk, Krishnamurti suddenly paused, leaned forward, and said, almost conspiratorially, “Do you want to know what my secret is?” Almost as though we were one body we sat up, even more alert than we had been, if that was possible. I could see people all around me lean forward, their ears straining and their mouths slowly opening in hushed anticipation.

Krishnamurti rarely ever talked about himself or his own process, and now he was about to give us his secret! He was in many ways a mountaintop teacher—somewhat distant, aloof, seemingly unapproachable, unless you were part of his inner circle.

Yet that’s why we came to Ojai every spring, to see if we could find out just what his secret was. We wanted to know how he managed to be so aware and enlightened, while we struggled with conflict and our numerous problems.

There was a silence. Then he said in a soft, almost shy voice, “You see, I don’t mind what happens.”

I don’t mind what happens. That is the essence of inner freedom. This is the secret to happiness. It is a timeless spiritual truth: release attachment to outcomes, and—deep inside yourself—you’ll feel good no matter what. You’ll feel good because you are connected to, one with, the energy of the universe, the beauty and power of creation itself. Or, as Krishnamurti himself put it:

“When you live with this awareness, this sensitivity, life has an astonishing way of taking care of you. Then there is no problem of security, of what people say or do not say, and that is the beauty of life.”

 

The 12 Biggest Life Secrets Forgotten By Mankind

Posted December 1, 2016 By Mark

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Here is a list of 12 life secrets I believe we have forgotten, or more importantly, a list of 12 things to remember:

1. We forgot our place in the natural world:

This is the first of the 12 forgotten life secrets. In the last couple of hundred years we have detached ourselves from nature. We have exploited, ravaged, consumed and attempted to control nature to appease our greed driven by self-absorbed madness. We tried to distance ourselves from the natural circle of life. We forgot how to listen to and understand the natural rhythms and cycles of the earth – its signs and languages. We forgot to follow nature’s path and live in balance with it.

2. We forgot our connection to life and the cosmos:

By detaching ourselves from nature, we forgot that we are deeply connected to it and to the cycles of the universe. Some tribes on the outskirts of ‘civilization’, and who still follow ancestral ways, have preserved this connection with respect and reverence. We, on the other hand have instilled a sense of separateness which drove us out of balance and in dis-ease.  We forgot how all consciousness is interconnected and weaved into a delicate and beautiful dance.

 

3. We forgot our ancient wisdom:

We forgot our ancestral wisdom. In the quest to gain scientific knowledge through the rationalization of our mind, we forgot the wisdom through the opening of our heart. We forgot the ancient stories and folk wisdom that was handed down from from seers and wise men of antiquity who lived in harmony with the universe.

4. We forgot our path and our dreams:

By stirring away from our inner path we forgot to dream the dream of life. More importantly we forgot how to awake in that dream and see our true nature as co-creators of life – as the dreamers. We forgot that we have the power to weave dreams and use our power of intention to direct those dreams into manifestation.

5. We forgot our purpose:

With too much chatter, noise and distraction in this dense reality we forgot what we came here to do. We forgot our purpose. We are caught in the mass trance of fabricated consensual reality. We lost sight of our authenticity, that inner spark that drives us towards our happiness and self-realization. We forgot that we are here to be realized as spiritual beings embodied in a physical form and embedded in a congenial universe.

6. We forgot that everything is Love:

This is perhaps the deepest mystery of all that only some seers came to understand it as an all-embracing truth. That truth however is hidden somewhere deep inside of us. We knew it at some point but have lost touch with it. We forgot that everything is ultimately energy and consciousness and that love is the fundamental fabric of existence that runs through all energy and consciousness.

7. We forgot to Forgive:

By being made to believe that we are separate and disconnected from the others and from everything else, we forgot to forgive. In its deepest sense forgiveness is the act of reminding ourselves that we are one with everyone and everything and that there is no victim or perpetrator. It’s just all of us together moving together in a dynamic web we call life.

8. We forgot to be Free:

Remind yourself one thing everyday: You were made to be free.

We were born and raised in a ‘reality’ where freedom is only a concept. We were bound to the shackles of fear, misconceptions, false ideologies, material reward and held ransom to rules and laws laid down to safeguard the interest of the few. We were made to forget that we are free agents of change. We are free to be who we are without fear or guilt.

9. We forgot our real power:

Living in fear has made us forget how powerful we are. We forgot the massive power of our will and intention to change our reality. We have been tranced into sleepwalking and following the ready made signs like automatons.

10. We forgot our lessons from history:

If there is something that history has taught us is how fast we are at forgetting our lessons. Time and time again we keep on repeating the same mistakes, stuck in the same patterns of greed and self-destruction. We cannot be blamed individually for the mistakes done by humanity in the past but we are responsible as individuals to to remind ourselves of the past mistakes and pass it on to the collective psyche.

11. We forgot to be simple:

Human life got more complex and complicated. We are seduced by the glitter of more and not by the power of less. We forgot to be simple and the meaning of simplicity. Life is simple really. Simplicity means discarding all the inessential stuff and ideas that clutter the view to our life purpose and the other truths we have forgotten.

12. We forgot to trust, believe and wonder:

This is the last of the 12 biggest life secrets forgotten by all of us. We lost our enchantment with the world. We forgot to be wondered by the miracle of life. We do not stand in awe at the majesty of it all anymore. Our skepticism and cynical view of the world has made us lose trust in ourselves and the magic of the universe. We forgot how to believe. This is perhaps the biggest tragedy of all. It weakened our spirit and impoverished our soul.

7 Ways To Simplify Your Life And Be Happy

Posted November 26, 2016 By Mark
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When I ask millennial ‘s “What would be a successful life for you?” the responses range from being wealthy, being a top executive in their company, being famous and known, to setting up their own business, traveling the world and so on. However, when I ask ‘What is it that gives you lasting happiness?’ I get very different responses: ‘Making my mom happy, helping people in need, being in love, being understood and valued, providing for my family, enjoying quality time with friends’. It all boils down to devouring the simple joys of life and having fulfilling relationships.

 

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Initially, I found it rather odd to see people have such different paths to success and happiness. Shouldn’t success make you happy? And isn’t being happy, being successful? However, as I continued digging deeper with those powerful questions, I realized that our definition of success is largely shaped (read distorted) by the society. You are only successful if you are rich, popular, at the top end of the corporate ladder with a huge mansion and a Ferrari, taking at least four margarita-soaked vacations every year. If you come to think of it, in the quest of worldly pleasures, our lives have become so complicated and cluttered, that we seem to have forgotten the basics.

The other day as I was working at a café, I could overhear a bunch of twenty-somethings sitting on the next table discussing how tough the work environment is, how people have become so impatient and unreasonable. How bosses don’t trust you with deadlines and keep following up every day. They were trying to call the waiter, but as it was a busy time, it took a while for their waiter and food to come. As they went on with their rambling, the waiter finally came with their food. One of them burst out and complained about the delay, in a rather rude way. He even went on to say the service is pathetic, and he will never come here again. The waiter apologized profusely and called the manager who did the same.

With no intention to judge anyone, I was just appalled at the sheer dichotomy of words and actions, whereby they were whining and complaining about their work environment for those same behaviors of impatience and intolerance, which they were guilty of themselves, in another work environment, without even realizing it.

We have to be the change we wish to see in others. It does not work any other way. If we want to live a simpler, happier life, we need to go back to basics and rekindle the values of empathy, tolerance, compassion, trust and love in ourselves.

Where do we start? For me, back to basics is a journey of simplification to a fulfilling, soulful life. I firmly believe that deep down we are all good human beings who are born and raised with good morals and values. As we grow up and let life happen to us, with all its issues and challenges, we get to a point where our core essence is suppressed and overshadowed. All we need is to de-clutter our lives from these complications and superficialities to reconnect with our core.

Easier said than done? Sure, here are my top 7 tips to simplify your life:

1. Reconnect with your core and align your choices with it.

Know who you are and what is important to you. Step back to (re) discover your essence: the values and beliefs you hold dear and the strengths that you possess. Once this is done, align every choice and decision in your life to it. From daily activities to major decisions. Upon doing this exercise, I realized how important having ‘FUN’ is for me. Since we only have so many hours in a day, now I ensure that I do not waste time being bored to death in activities or with people that do not interest me.

2. Free up your time to free up your mind

Slow down! What about that awesome to-do list of yours with a million and one tasks? Slash it down by half, yes that’s correct! Go through it again and think about every task on the list, do you really want to do it? Is it necessary? Can it wait until tomorrow? Have a want-to list instead of a to-do list.

There is compelling evidence that we get more done when we slow down. Don’t fall for multi-tasking; it’s an illusion of productivity. Slowing down frees up our mind and allows for more creative and intuitive thinking. It makes us better listeners as we are present in the moment.

3. Recover from ‘perfection-vitus.’

Stop sweating the small stuff. Nothing in life is perfect and in your quest for perfectionism, you spend way too much time on things that could have followed the famous 80-20 rule. I’m the biggest culprit of being a perfectionist. Couple that with being highly results oriented and you get someone who will passionately work day and night to get the job done, almost perfectly, while  hardly being able to enjoy the creative process.

4. Spend 2 hours everyday ‘gadget-free’.

Ditch the screen! With all your hi-tech devices and tools, you are still working longer and harder. Wouldn’t hurt anyone to let go of them just for 2 hours a day. Without the usual overstimulation, you will realize how long those two hours of the day were and thank me for many important things you got done.

5. Do not trade your life for money

Adopt minimalism as a lifestyle. Ok, I hear you, you don’t have to strip life down to its bare bones. Instead, after having the clarity of your core values, needs and wants, you need to take stock of all the material inventory you possess and assess whether you really have more than needed. Less is more. Investing in life’s experiences with people close to us brings the most joy overtime. Life is all about memories.

6. Delete negativity from your life: thoughts, emotions, and people.

Walk away from haters! Negative thoughts, emotions, and people drain you by sucking all your energy. Negativity is contagious and toxic, it spreads like a virus, feeding off one another’s fears and anxieties. How to deal with it? See the tip below, the best saved for the last.

7. Practice Gratitude and give back

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Allow yourself to recognize all you have. Gratitude takes practice. In our fast-paced lives, it is not something that will come naturally to us every day. Make room for it by reflecting and counting your blessings. You could write post-its in the morning and put them on your fridge as reminders, or mark your calendar with all the things you are thankful for. Before you sleep, replay the movie of your day or week and watch it with the eyes of an unprivileged outsider (always works). Take a quiet, solitary walk and appreciate all the goodness of nature around you. Say your prayers and connect with your spiritual self. Once you learn this art, you would automatically want to give back and share what you have with others.

 

Credit:

Want to take this ‘back to basics’ philosophy to your workplace? Want to increase your productivity by simplifying your work schedule? Get in touch with me at samia@directiondose.com for a free session or visit www.directiondose.com to find out how I can help you.

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Would you like to become instantly happier… Improve your health and your relationships… And manifest more abundance in your life?

What if I told you that there’s one thing YOU can do right now to achieve all of these wonderful things, almost instantly?

Well, I’ll let you in on a little secret – it’s called practicing GRATITUDE.

And if you’d like to make sure you’re opening the doors to more wealth, fulfillment and success in your life, then discover below 5 Scientifically Proven Benefits of Gratitude That Will Inspire You To Practice it Daily!

1. You become instantly happier.

When you focus on all the good things in your life, you immediately shift your perspective from negative to positive, which brings you immediate feelings of happiness as well. Don’t believe me? Try it now!

2. You become more aware of the present moment.

Every time you pause to appreciate all the amazing things happening in your life… good company, your health, the savory food on your plate, or the clean air you’re breathing, you become more aware of the present moment.

3. You experience unshakable health.

Recent studies show that keeping an attitude of gratitude helps you have better sleep, less physical pain, reduced stress and depression, plus it gives a boost to your immune system.

4. It helps you become a better person.

Even though it may be extremely challenging to be grateful when you’re going through difficult times in life, did you know that this is when it’s most important to be grateful?

These situations have shaped you into the person that you are now and you should be thankful for them, as they make you grow, evolve and become a better version of yourself.

5. It opens the door to more abundance in your life.

Every time you’re grateful, you’re also activating the Law of Attraction in your life.

The LOA says that ‘like attracts like’ and every time you focus on abundance, rather than lack, you’re attracting more of what you really want.

The more you consciously start using the power of gratitude, the more you’ll be releasing an unlimited flow of wealth, abundance and happiness into your life.

Resilience from the Heart

Posted November 13, 2016 By Mark
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Plus 5 Simple Steps For Learning To Trust Your Gut

Have you ever been faced with a decision that seemed impossible to make?

Maybe it was a question as to whether or not to go forward with a medical procedure that wasn’t aligned with your belief system; maybe it was whether to stay in a difficult relationship or end it; or maybe it was a question that, if answered the wrong way, could have life-and-death consequences for you or a loved one?

The one thing that links these questions together—as different are they are from one another—is that none of them has an absolute answer. For each situation there is no “right” or “wrong.” There is no truth book you can turn to that will tell you which answer to choose.

And if you’ve ever been in a situation where you had to make this kind of decision, you probably discovered that every friend you asked for help had a unique opinion as to which path was right for you, so you ended up with a collection of opinions that make the original question even more confusing.

There are different kinds of challenges in life that are best solved through different ways of thinking: some with the brain and some with the heart. And while heart-based thinking may be less familiar in our fast world of technology and digital information, in a very real sense it is perhaps the most sophisticated technology we’ll ever know.

Resilience From the Heart  repeat-these-words-a-hundred-times-a-day-and-watch-what-happens

The single eye of the heart—the state of harmony that we create for ourselves in heart-brain coherence—accesses what’s true for us in the moment of a given situation. Rather than thinking through a list of the pros and cons or weighing out the probability that an experience of the past will repeat itself in the present, our heart intelligence knows instantly what’s true for us in the moment.

We’re Only 18 Inches Away From The Next Step of Human Evolution

There is a saying among certain indigenous and ancient mystery traditions when it comes to the way we live our lives, and how we come to terms with life’s experiences. Though the traditions are different from one another, they are bound together by the theme of a common thread of wisdom:

In order for us to come full circle and embrace our personal power in life, we must first embark upon a journey of personal discovery. And while the journey may lead us away from what’s been familiar in the past, and may take our entire lifetime to complete, the distance of our trip is a short one. It only covers about 18 inches.

The truth is: whether we’re tall or short, and regardless of the race or nationality we call our heritage, for all of us the average distance from the center of our brains to the middle of our hearts is the same: 18 inches.

But the short distance can be deceptive. Depending on the beliefs of our families, our communities, our religions, and what happens in our life experiences, it can take months, years, or a lifetime to learn how to make the shift from the logical thinking of the mind to the intuitive wisdom of the heart, and when it’s appropriate to do so.

“If the 20th century has been the Century of the Brain . . .  then the 21st century should be the Century of the Heart.”
— Gary E. R. Schwartz, Ph.D., and Linda G. S. Russek, Ph.D.,

Authors of The Living Energy Universe

The recent discovery of the “little brain” in the heart, however, and the benefits it affords us tells us that to make such a shift is certainly worth the effort. It’s the journey that takes us out of the either-or polarity thinking of the brain, and into the intuitive knowing of our heart. And while the ability to do so would be empowering for us at any time, it is especially so now, in our lifetime of converging extremes.

We’ve all heard the adage that the only constant in life is change. We’ve also heard that change can be one of the most stressful experiences we face in life. And it’s that stress of change that biologists tell us is the trigger for new ways of thinking and living—the evolutionary transformation that makes us better people, creates stronger families and communities, and ultimately promises our survival as a species. The formula is clear: the bigger the shift, the greater the transformation.

We’re living the shift from creating our lives based upon the way our MINDS see the world to a new way of thinking and livingbased upon the way our HEARTS and minds sense the world.

What’s important here is that whatever change life brings to your doorstep, it’s only a problem if you don’t know how to embrace it in a healthy way. As you learn to merge the senses of your heart and the logic of your brain into a single potent system, you empower yourself to beneficially manage change in your life.

I use the following technique, sometimes on a daily basis, to help me plan my day, temper relationships, and honor the principles that are important to me when I’m tested in life. What I know with certainty is that we can never go wrong when we honor our hearts. I also know that if heart intelligence works for me, it will work for you as well.

Exercise: How to Ask Your Heart a Question

Your heart’s intelligence is with you always. It’s constant. You can trust it. It’s important to acknowledge this, because it means that the wisdom of your heart—the answers to the deepest and most mysterious questions of life that no one else can answer—already exists within you. Rather than something that needs to be built or created before it can be used, the link between your heart and the place that holds your answers is already established. It’s been with you since the time you were born and has never left you. It’s up to you as to when you choose to access that link as a “hotline” to the deepest truths of your life. It’s also up to you as to how you apply the wisdom of your heart in the reality of your everyday life.

The steps for accessing your heart’s intelligence are as follows:

5 Steps to Learn to Trust Your Gut – Learning The Language Of Resilience From The Heart

Step 1: Focus Your Heart

Action: Allow your awareness to move from your mind to the area of your heart.

Result: This sends a signal to your heart that a shift has taken place—you are no longer engaged in the world around you and are now becoming aware of the world within you.

Step 2: Slow Your Breathing

Action: Begin to breathe a little more slowly than usual, allowing five to six seconds for your inhale and exhale.

Result: This simple step sends a second signal to your body that you are safe and in a place that supports your process. Deep, slow breathing has long been known to stimulate a relaxation response of the nervous system (the parasympathetic response).

Step 3: Feel a Rejuvenating Feeling

Action: To the best of your ability, feel a genuine sense of caring, appreciation, gratitude, or compassion for anything or anyone.

Result: The key to success here is for your feeling to be as sincere and heartfelt as possible. As described previously, it’s the quality of this feeling that fine-tunes and optimizes the coherence between your heart and your brain. While everyone is capable of this experience, it’s one of those processes that you may need to experiment with to find what works best for you.

Step 4: Ask Your Heart Intelligence a Question

Action: The previous three steps create the harmony between your brain and your heart that enables you to tap into your heart’s wisdom. As you continue to breathe and hold the focus in your heart,  this is the time to ask your question.

Result: Heart intelligence generally works best when the questions are brief and to the point. Remember, your heart doesn’t need a preface or the history of a situation before the question. Ask your question silently as a single concise sentence and then allow your heart’s wisdom to respond in a way that works for you.

Step 5: Listen

Action: Become aware of how your body feels immediately as you are asking your question. Make a note of any sensations such as warmth, tingling, ringing of the ears, and emotions that may arise. Everyone learns and experiences uniquely. There is no correct or incorrect way of receiving your heart’s wisdom. The key here is to know what works best for you.

Result: For people who are already attuned to their bodies’ and their hearts’ intelligence, this step is the easiest part of the process. For those who may have less experience in listening to their bodies, this is an exercise in awareness.

I tend to receive my heart’s wisdom as words while at the same time I’m feeling the sensations in my body. Other people never hear the words but experience a nonverbal communication only, such as warmth radiating from their hearts or their gut. Sometimes people feel a wave of peace wash over them as they receive the answer to their question. What’s important here is to listen to your body and to learn how it communicates with you. Everyone’s body communicates differently.

I can honestly say that my heart’s wisdom has never led me to make a bad choice. And while I haven’t used this technique for every big decision I’ve made in my life, I can also say with honesty that the only choices I’ve regretted are the ones I made when I did not honor my heart’s wisdom.

Now you have a step-by-step technique to help you feel empowered in the face of life’s greatest challenges.

While you probably can’t change the situations that arrive at your doorstep, you can definitely change the way to feel and respond to those situations.

If you haven’t already done so, you may discover that your ability to access the wisdom of your heart, on demand, becomes a good friend to you and one of your greatest sources of strength in life. The consistency and accuracy of heart-based solutions empower you to face any situation, meet with any person or force, with a confidence that’s hard to find when you feel helpless, overwhelmed, powerless, and lost.

Once we learn the power of Resilience from the Heart, we can create it for ourselves, our families, and our communities, and apply it in our everyday lives.

In this time of extremes, the resilience that we develop as individuals becomes even more effective, powerful, and potent when it can be applied by our families, friends, and neighbors. When we share our healing insights, we find the answer to the question of what it takes to create a way of life that reflects the values we’ve discovered through our personal journey.

The time is now… cultivate your power to THRIVE in life.

Happiness

Posted November 6, 2016 By Mark
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Just a simple graphic.  Would that we all to learn this simple truth.  It comes from within.

 

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10 Things Your Soul Wants You To Know

Posted October 11, 2016 By Mark

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1.  You are good just the way you are

The biggest success in life is to not really change, grow or transform yourself. The biggest success is to be at peace with yourself and to accept everything you have done or said before. Transformation is a choice we all have, but from the soul’s perspective, it is not the greatest priority.


 2.  You are meant to feel deeply

You are meant to really feel. Don’t hold back your tears, and don’t think it is soft, or overly sensitive to expressive yourself. It is great to feel deeply and to give yourself permission to experience the richness of human emotion. Feel happiness. Feel sadness. Don’t walk in between as you daydream, and take the time to amerce yourself in every moment. This is the main porpoise of life.


3.  Be mindful

Mindfulness is simply the focus of your attention on the present moment, but it is anything but simple. With chaotic schedules, multi-tasking and an over-worked society, it is often hard to remain in the present and not get lost in the chaos that surrounds us. Mindfulness has roots in Buddhism, but most religions and spirituality practices include some attention towards love, kindness, and appreciation for a perspective on life that is bigger than oneself.


 

4.  Calmness

When we are calm, we can truly listen. As we listen we open ourselves to understand and it is within the stillness that we can feel the greatest connection to our soul’s wisdom. That is why meditation, being still in nature and finding a quiet moment for ourselves feel so appealing. They are opportunities to connect with who we truly are. Kind, compassionate, gentle and wise. We just have to listen.


5.  Let go of outcome

If we work hard at something, it’s natural to want some kind of “award.” But when you become attached to outcome, it can take the joy out of the process. Life presents us with infinite variations of this important distinction—between what we can change and what we can’t, between what is within our control and what isn’t.


6.  Presence – the most precious thing 

People don’t realize that now is all there ever is; there is no past or future except as memory or anticipation in your mind. Most humans are never fully present in the now, because unconsciously they believe that the next moment must be more important than this one. But then you miss your whole life, which is never not now. “As soon as you honor the present moment, all unhappiness and struggle dissolve, and life begins to flow with joy and ease.


7.  Never lose the perspective

Typically, when we’re worried or upset, it’s because we’ve lost perspective. Everything that is happening in our lives seems so big, so important, so do or die, but in the grand picture, this single hiccup often means next to nothing. The fight we’re having, the job we didn’t get, the real or imagined slight, the unexpected need to shift course, the thing we wanted, but didn’t get. Most of it doesn’t really matter.


8.  Self worth cannot be verified by others

If you constantly seek outside yourself for approval and validation, you will never be happy. We are all different and we all perceive things in different ways but your reputation is not something you can really control. Your reputation is not really in your hands, so stop trying to please everyone around you and start pleasing your own SELF.


9.  Everything you need is already within you

In this moment you have it all, right NOW and right here, there is nothing lacking. Take time to be quiet at least 5 minutes per day and in time you will discover that you do have access to HAPPINESS, PEACE, ABUNDANCE and all that is good at all times.


10.  Accept

To complain is always nonacceptance of what is. It invariably carries an unconscious negative charge. When you complain, you make yourself into a victim. When you speak out, you are in your power. So change the situation by taking action or by speaking out if necessary or possible; leave the situation or accept it. All else is madness.